Life is too short.

Another call from the recruiter who sent me to the interview at Sony. There is another position at Sony. Reluctantly, I schedule the interview. I am completely desperate for money and yet I still have attitude. Sometimes I shock myself with my own gall. But, there is nothing more soul crushing than being jerked around while your desperate. And there is nothing worse for a job search than a crushed soul because every time you tell someone that you are looking for a job, they ask you "what do you WANT to do?" or "what are you PASSIONATE about?"* And crushed souls have no wants or passion which evidently is what I need to find a job.

Part of my issue is that I am curious about a lot of things. Professionally, at least, I am not single-mindedly passionate about anything, but am curious and interested in many things. A dilettante? Maybe. Is that a bad thing? I have an interesting life, so my job does not necessarily have to be interesting, only my paycheck does.

The day before my interview at Sony I had the opportunity to go rafting midweek with out the summer crowd. Warm sunny day and an empty river? Of course I went. Especially since I was given $100 for gas, but only needed $50. Immediate cash trumps all.

The morning of the interview I was so tired from rafting I had to call and reschedule. I considered berating myself for being a flake, but I had to sleep instead. The first experience really left me with a bad feeling, I just could not feel bad about rescheduling.


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*They also say it as if they are the only ones who know this secret to success and act as if you must be hearing this little pearl for the very first time.

Home Sweet Home

August 2005

I leave the haven the first week of August and adjust to life in my humble 1-bedroom apartment. I actually really like my apartment, but after six weeks in the haven I have become really sensitive to how noisy my house is. The next door neighbors cannot close a door with out slamming it. The "Model School" preschool next door populated with the oh-so berkeley offspring of the intellectually privileged seem to be screaming in the playground at decibels far above what I recall, and for the first time I can hear traffic noise despite the fact that my cottage is in the back of the property behind a large two-story building. My urban filter has atrophied.

I still have no cash flow, and I do not remember how I managed August rent, I suspect a cash advance on a credit card was involved. Without the zen calm of the haven, my anxiety level goes up. The upside of the anxiety is that I have the energy to clean my house and since no amazing housekeeper comes to my house, the piles all over my house are far from neat and tidy like the housekeeper at the haven makes.


According to Feng Shui, this chaos aggravates the chi in my house. Not only do I decide to clean my house, but I also decide I must purge and get send extraneous stuff to goodwill.

Now, I am not entirely a new-age, crystal-healing freak. My take on Feng Shui is that it might work; and if it doesn't, the house gets clean and generally looks cool.

And hey- after got my house cleaned and a few layers of junk off to goodwill, I was placing a plant in my career area and the phone rang. It was a financial services company looking for a marketing specialist and after speaking with them briefly, she ask me to come in for an interview.

Coincidence? Maybe.

This blog never would have been started if I had gotten that job, so maybe it was a coincidence. On the other hand, maybe I needed a bigger plant.